i would punch a child for taco bell
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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