My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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