Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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