dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
