I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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