so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
