If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Randomize
