I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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