I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
zippers are such a cool invention
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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