one might say we're banned from that church
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
They took my balls.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
