dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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