so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
