Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
