That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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