Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
When did we convert life to cartoon?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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