I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Randomize
