The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize