I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize