4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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