she was so not down for the gang bang
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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