He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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