Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
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