either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
