dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
