How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
