Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
so let's talk penis.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
