This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
My breasts were aching with rage.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
