Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
