She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
