Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize
