For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
