Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
