I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
