whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
