Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
