sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Couch. On fire.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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