dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Randomize
