I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
you made out with another girl for some wings
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
