Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You may now shotgun with the bride
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
