: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
