Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Randomize
