We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
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