I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
