ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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