yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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