Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
