I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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