I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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