i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
oh god the rape fog is back!
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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