so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm at about main and main street
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
